random stuff

So, it's almost 12:30 a.m. and I am tired...but I just can't bring myself to go to bed. I have been thinking so much about my life in general. Completely random, I know.

So many things that I wish I had said or done, and even more that I wish I hadn't. Things I need to work on in my life. Things I need to work on in my home, lol. Weight I need to lose. Habits I need to form. All these things have been on my mind.

I miss my close friends. Most of them are hundreds of miles away. God brings different people in and out of our lives for a reason. I wish I knew why.

I miss my baby girl. I wish she was here with me, right now. I wish I knew why she's not.

I have a few regrets, I think that's normal. For the most part, I am completely content with what I have. I have a loving husband, an adorable and sweet little boy, a precious little girl that I have beautiful memories of, a kind and caring family, possessions that I don't need but God has blessed us with, a nice warm apartment that is filled with love, and caring and supportive friends.

No matter what random things come into my head, I can never forget the blessings that God has given. I am truly thankful that even in my darkest hour, I can cry to Him and He answers.

So much for my jumbled thoughts. I am getting sleepy now...

Long time!

Wow, haven't written in here in a long time. Not much to report, I guess.

Nate is almost 2 1/2 years old, he is growing so fast. Not saying a lot of words yet, but trying. We can understand key words and phrases that he's trying to say. He's not potty trained yet, that is a work in progress. He is so sweet, kisses and hugs us all the time, and loves to cuddle with us. He's so bright and creative, and makes me laugh every day. I'm so thankful for my little man! :)

Matt and I are doing well. I love my husband so much and am so thankful for him every day! Of course there are times where we have arguments, but they never last very long...he puts up with me!

I am trying so hard get organized...I am not a very organized person to begin with so I'm working on it! I am contemplating getting a preschool curriculum to work on with Nate, so that way our days are more "structured" and he learns what he needs to. I am trying to keep up with housework...anyone that knows me well knows that I am NOT a very good housekeeper but I am trying to do better. I know it is important anyway, and Nate is now at the age where can help me pick things up, keep his toys in his toy bin, etc. I know that if he doesn't see mommy do it, then he won't want to either.

That is pretty much it. I do have some drama in my life but I am trying to not be so stressed out about it, since there's nothing I can do about it. My new motto, thanks to my step-MIL, is this:

I can only control myself.

It may not sound like much, but it actually is a very deep thought...